Fun Section: Desi English

I've learned...That I can't choose how I feel, but I can choose what I do about it. You are NOT a DESI when..... > >* You don't open a conversation (on telephone) with a 'hello' but with a 'hi >' >* The telephone is never 'engaged', it's always 'busy'. >* You don't 'disconnect' a phone, you simply 'hang-up'. >* You never 'mess-up' things, you only 'screw them up'. >* You never have a 'residence' telephone number, you have a 'home' number; >you never have a 'office' telephone, you have a 'work' phone. >* You don't stop at the 'signals', but halt at the 'lights'. >* You don't 'accelerate', you 'step on the gas'. >* Your tire never 'punctures', you may have a 'flat'. >* There are no 'petrol pumps', but 'gas stations'. >* 'I don't know nothing'. Two negatives don't make a positive here. >* You no longer meet a 'wonderful' person, you meet a 'cool' guy >* No one stays 'a stone's throw away', rather 'a few blocks away'. >* There's no 'Town Side', it's 'Down Town'. >* Life's no longer 'miserable' it 'stinks'. >* You don't have a 'great' time, you have a 'ball'. >* You don't 'sweat it out', you 'work your butt off'. >* You no longer live in 'flats', you live in 'apartments'. >* You don't stand in a 'queue', you are in a 'line'. >* You are not 'disgusting', you are 'sick'. >* You can't get 'surprised', you get 'zapped'. >* You don't 'schedule' a meeting, you 'skejule' it. >* You never 'joke', U just 'kid'. For example, 'Are u kidding?' >* You don't ask somebody 'How r u?' You say 'What's up dude?' >* There's no 'zero' but 'O', no 'Z' but zee; >* There's no full stop after a statement, there's a period.