Showing posts with label Funny sms. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Funny sms. Show all posts

Sunday, 8 July 2012

Fun Section: Funny Sms




Ways girls turn romantic guys down !!!
(LOVE JOKES)
HE: I'm a photographer i've been looking for a face like yours!
SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon .i've been looking for a face like yours!!!
HE: Hi!didn't we go on a date once? or was it twice?
SHE: Must've been once.i never make the same mistake twice!!!
HE: May I have the pleasure of this dance?
SHE: No,i'd like to have some pleasure too!!!
HE: How did you get to be so beautiful?
SHE: I must've been given your share!!!
HE: Is it hot in here or is it just you?
SHE: It's hot!!!
HE: I'd go to the ends of the world for you!
SHE: Okay,but would you stay there?
HE: Will you come out with me this Saturday?
SHE: Sorry! i'm having a headache this weekend!!!
HE: Your face must turn a few heads!
SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs!!!
HE: Go on ,don't be shy.Ask me out!
SHE: Okay,get out!!!
HE: I think I could make you very happy
SHE: Why,are you leaving?
HE: What would you say if I asked u to marry me?
SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time!!!
HE: Can I have your name?
SHE: why,don't you already have one?
HE: Shall we go and see a film?
SHE: I've already seen it!!!
HE: Do you think it was fate which brought us together?
SHE: Nah,it was plain bad luck!!!
HE: You know I can't seem to get your face out of my mind.
SHE: Wow really, I have a similar problem I cant seem to get you out of my face!!!
HE: When I look at your face, I can't hold my self down..
SHE: And when I look at your face I can't seem to keep my food down!
HE: You know when they made u they must have broken the mold.
SHE: Yeah and when they were making you must have leaked out of your mold!!
HE: Roses are red, Violets are blue, could there be anyone as beautiful as you?
SHE: Roses are red, Violets are blue, i'm sure there's no-one as ugly as you!
HE: Do you have a phone number I can reach you on?
She: Sorry, telephones are against my religion!!!
HE: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
SHE: Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore.
HE: Is this seat empty?
SHE: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.
HE: I'd like to call you. What's your number?
SHE: It's in the phone book.
HE: But I don't know your name.
SHE: That's in the phone book too.
HE: Hey, baby, what's your sign?
SHE: Do not Enter
HE: I know how to please a woman.
SHE: Then please leave me alone.
HE: I want to give myself to you.
SHE: Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts.
HE: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy
SHE: Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.
HE: Your body is like a temple
SHE: Sorry, there are no services today.
HE: I hope you didn't hurt yourself when fell to earth from heaven.
SHE: No, but it looks like you landed on your face!

Fun Section: Desi English


I've learned...That I can't choose how I feel, but I can choose what I
do about it.

You are NOT a DESI when.....
>
>* You don't open a conversation (on telephone) with a
'hello' but with a 'hi
>'
>* The telephone is never 'engaged', it's always
'busy'.
>* You don't 'disconnect' a phone, you simply
'hang-up'.
>* You never 'mess-up' things, you only 'screw them
up'.
>* You never have a 'residence' telephone number, you
have a 'home' number;
>you never have a 'office' telephone, you have a
'work' phone.
>* You don't stop at the 'signals', but halt at the
'lights'.
>* You don't 'accelerate', you 'step on the gas'.
>* Your tire never 'punctures', you may have a 'flat'.

>* There are no 'petrol pumps', but 'gas stations'.
>* 'I don't know nothing'. Two negatives don't make a
positive here.
>* You no longer meet a 'wonderful' person, you meet a
'cool' guy
>* No one stays 'a stone's throw away', rather 'a few
blocks away'.
>* There's no 'Town Side', it's 'Down Town'.
>* Life's no longer 'miserable' it 'stinks'.
>* You don't have a 'great' time, you have a 'ball'.
>* You don't 'sweat it out', you 'work your butt off'.

>* You no longer live in 'flats', you live in
'apartments'.
>* You don't stand in a 'queue', you are in a 'line'.
>* You are not 'disgusting', you are 'sick'.
>* You can't get 'surprised', you get 'zapped'.
>* You don't 'schedule' a meeting, you 'skejule' it.
>* You never 'joke', U just 'kid'. For example, 'Are u
kidding?'
>* You don't ask somebody 'How r u?' You say 'What's
up dude?'
>* There's no 'zero' but 'O', no 'Z' but zee;
>* There's no full stop after a statement, there's a
period.


Funny Poetry, Funny SMS (URDU) Part - II

Kon kehta hai pyaar may pakray jaain gay?
Waqt aanay per behen bhai ban jaain gay

Mohabbat mujhay un jawano se hai
Jo khatay peetay gharano se hain

Aj bagh may kali hai, kal gulaab ho ga
Mujh se shadi karlo, tum ko sawab ho ga
(Jo tum say shadi karay,is ka dimaagh kharaab ho ga)

Itnay dino se jalanay nahi aya
Galti hui aag ko bujhanay nahi aya
Kehta tha saath jeeyain gay saath marain gay
Ab rooth gai hoon to ullu ka patha mananay bhi nahi aya.

Ghar se roz jata hai wo
Maa ko bohot rulata hai wo
Kambakht baap
Sab ko hi sathatha hai wo


Dil kay armaa aansoo'on may behay gaay
Un kay bachay hamay mamu kehay gaay

Hum nay tumhay dil diya dildar samajh kar
Tum kha gaye is ko naswaar samajh kar

Dabbay may dabba, dabbay may khargosh
Nana nay aankh mari, nani behosh

Khuda karay sab haseenaaon ke baap mar jaain
Maut ka bahana ho aur hum in kay ghar jaain

Ishq kay samander main ghota lagaya
Pani bohat thanda tha main bahar nikal aya


Un ki gali say guzray,aj jab ittefaq tha
Unho nay phool phanka,gamla bhi saath tha

Wo ankh bari pyaari thi jo hum nay usay mari thi
Wo sandle bari bhari thi jo us nay hamay mari thi

Mera dil para hai loose
Is ko matt karo tum use
Warna parain gay tum ko shoes

Funny Poetry, Funny SMS (URDU)

>>Arz kia hai ........ (poem of this era)
>> >
>> >jo sadiyaon se hota aaya hai woh repeat kar doonga...
>> >Tu naa mili to tujhko dil sey Ctrl+Alt+delete kar doonga..= .
>> >******************
>> >company kee ladkiyaan sunder hain aur lonely hain...
>> >Problem ye hai ki bus voh READ-ONLY hain...
>> >******************
>> >Shayad mere pyar ko taste karna bhool gayeee tum ...
>> >Dil sey aisa CUT kiya ke PASTE karna bhool gayeee tum...
>> >******************
>> >Tumhare samne hain itney items kabhi hameee bhi pick karo.= ..
>> >Hamare pyar ke ICON pe kabhi to tum DOUBLE-CLICK karo...
>> >******************
>> >Roz subha hum karte hai itne pyar se unhe good morning...
>> >woh humhe ghoor kar dekhte hain jaise 0 ERRORS but 5 WARNI= NGS...
>> >
>> >Ho gayi galti humse, click ho gaya mouse
>> >Duniya ki parwaah chhodo, ban jaao meri spouse!
>> >* * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * *
>> >
>> >Tumse mila main kal to, mere dil mein hua ek sound,
>> >Lekin aaj tum mili to kehti ho: Your file not found!
>> >* * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * *
>> >
>> >Ab aur kaho na tum, "but" ya "if"
>> >Tum ho meri zindagi ki animated gif
>> >* * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * *
>> >
>> >Aisa bhi nahin hai ke, I don't like your face
>> >Par dil ke computer mein, nahin hai enough disk space
>> >* * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * *
>> >
>> >Ghar se nikalti ho tum jab, pehen ke evening gown
>> >Too many requests se ho jaata hai..., server down
>> >* * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * *
>> >
>> >Tumhaare liye pyaar ki application, create main karoonga
>> >Tum usse debug karna, wait main karoonga
>> >* * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * *
>> >
>> >Tumhaara intezaar karte karte, main so gaya
>> >Yeh dekho mera connection kaa, time out ho gaya
>> >* * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * *
>> >
>> >Kya chaal hai tumhaari, jaise chalti hai koi cat
>> >What is your ICQ number, aao karein hum chat
>> >* * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * ** * *
>> >
>> >Tum jabse meri zindagi mein, aayi ho banke female
>> >Yaad raha na ab kuch, na postman , na heee koi e-Mail
>> >